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Did you know that the people living near a cemetery cant be buried there?

Reveal punchline

Because they’re still alive

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Why did the artist go to jail?

Reveal punchline

Because he was framed.

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?

Reveal punchline

Ten-tickles.

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What do you call a horse that lives next door?

Reveal punchline

A neighbour.

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What did one wall say to the other?

Reveal punchline

"I'll meet you at the corner."

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Why do doctors always stay calm?

Reveal punchline

Because they have a lot of patients

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What do you call a belt made of watches?

Reveal punchline

A waist of time.

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What do you call a sleeping bull?

Reveal punchline

A bulldozer.

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What is an astronaut’s favourite part of a computer?

Reveal punchline

The space bar.

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What did the zero say to the eight?

Reveal punchline

"Nice belt!"

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Why did the man name his dogs Rolex and Timex?

Reveal punchline

Because they were watch dogs.

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How do you organise a space party?

Reveal punchline

You planet.

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Why are elevator jokes so good?

Reveal punchline

They work on so many levels.

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Why don't skeletons fight each other?

Reveal punchline

They don't have the guts.

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Why did the banker quit his job?

Reveal punchline

He lost interest.

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Why did the bicycle fall over?

Reveal punchline

Because it was two-tired.

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Why did the stadium get hot after the game?

Reveal punchline

All the fans left.

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How do you make a tissue dance?

Reveal punchline

You put a little boogie in it.

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What did one hat say to the other?

Reveal punchline

You wait here. I’ll go on a head.

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“Dad, I’m struggling. I just found out I lost my job. My girlfriend broke up with me, I’m three months behind on rent, my car got repossessed, and I barely have enough money to eat. I haven’t slept in days, I feel like my whole life is falling apart, and I honestly don’t know what to do anymore.”

Reveal punchline

“Hi Struggling, I’m Dad.”

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